ADHD: to be or not to be

I have a 12 year old son who was diagnosed with ADHD. With my background (Jamaican) we don’t believe in things like this where they suggest medicine to help with the situation. We tend to ignore the issue and don’t claim it. I want to tell you that it is real!

I noticed at a young age that he was quite unique. It was the simple act of reading a book to him when he was a toddler and not having his full attention. His attention would continue to jump back and forth between his toys and me reading. This was a good thing because it allowed him to attend regular daytime school at the age of 3. It was difficult to handle my son at the young age, but I pressed forward knowing that things would change and he would grow out of it.

Ha! Who was I kidding?! No really? It was a change alright. From one phase to the next. For every phase I had to learn new strategies on how to work with him. I thought I was the only person dealing with this and felt I was lacking experience. It really played with my emotions and I would ask why me. How selfish? One of the biggest issue was his lack of ability to take ownership of his actions. He lacked the ability to see his wrongs and accept the consequences. In his head consequences meant that everyone was against him. I use to punish him by taking away his phone and keeping him inside for a day. After sitting down with a counselor, my way of punishment was a bit extreme. I was told that I should explain the punishment along with the reason, but there can only be one consequences. I took the counselor advice and it helped lightened the situation.

My son is loving and caring and displays great leadership to his peers. Everyone loves his smooth laid back character, BUT! Yeah that famous word that comes after the positive feedbacks during parent/teacher night. It was almost like I knew what they would say each time we had a meeting. The recommendation is always for me to consider giving him meds to CONTROL him. Sigh. Couldn’t there be another way out?

He expressed to me that he doesn’t want to take meds and he will work on it. Everyday is treated differently. I know in order for me to help my son, I need to work on myself. I am taking it one day at a time with him and I believe he will get better as he mature. I also have a great support system from the school district who also wants to see him succeed.

ADHD does not define who he is. He is a sweet, smart, kind being who is always eager to help. He will succeed in whatever he decides to become in the future. Don’t be afraid to talk about it. Find someone to express your journey and help release any frustration that has occurred.

Achieve goals

Determined to see them through

Humble to accept the progress

Defeat all odds

Do you have a child that was labeled ADHD?

Check out Support for ADHD!

Is being comfortable holding you back?

I have been working for Integra LifeSciences for 6 years now. I enjoy doing what I do at this company. I’ve moved up to a coordinator position and it’s been good ever since. I love the fact that they work with me in regards to my personal life which sometimes requires emergency leave. Whether it’s the kids doctor appointment or my own, I am able to get the time off needed. I work hard to gain that benefit by being dependable and produce high volume productivity.

I graduated National American University August of 2018 with my Bachelor of Science in Management. I am currently preparing my mental state to take the exam for the medical biller. It cost a lot of money and I need to be focus at this time to complete it. I am proud of my accomplishment considering my minor setbacks in life.

So what’s holding me at this job?

1. It is five minutes away from home, which makes it close by to my kids school

2. Consistent income

3. Easy data entry work which I have mastered.

4. The ability of to respond to an emergency quickly from the kids school.

5. Colleagues are easy to work with and makes it fun to work.

6. Insurance….. good insurance

7. Reliable

There are a lot of positions opening in other companies but they are starting employees off as temps with no benefits. How can a single mother survive without insurance and has one child with braces?

I am too comfortable at this job because it provides a steady income. Some say FEAR holds us back from achieving our goals. Fear could well be why I’m COMFORTABLE where I’m at. Just a different way of saying it.

Things to do: submit my resume to the other company and be content with whatever the results are.

We all deserve greatness and I am eager to obtain it one way or another. Be blessed not stressed

Celebrated my work sissy birthday before she went on vacation!

Theme: Tiffany & Co.

Hair: To cut or not to cut

I decided to take my mother to the barber shop to get her hair cut. She normally wears a high top and leaves her hair naturally gray. I’ve been rocking weave non stop and purchased three wigs within a month and a half. I would roughly spend $60 each and that time I would have spent a total of $180.00.

I sat there waiting with my mom and made the decision right then and there to cut my hair. I always said hair does not define my beauty. Thanks to India Irie. It was nerve recking in the beginning of the process while sitting in the barbers chair. As he lined me up I had a different mindset. I felt renewed and ready for something new.

It’s odd to see a woman with shaved head but I didn’t care what people thought about my new cut. I did worry about one persons opinion and that was my five year old son Jayden. He is always vocal and says whatever comes to his mind. Jayden walked in the room with an awkward smile and said ” what?!! You cut your hair?! You look UGLY”. I laughed so loud and I wasn’t bothered by it. I expected it. That didn’t stop him from checking on me and kissing me to let me know he missed me. Despite what people may think is mean, Jayden loves me unconditionally.

I love myself unconditionally and therefore I love my hair cut unconditionally too. When you do things in life , do it for yourself. The only persons input that should mean something the most will be yourself and your closest love ones. Be bold and Walk in your boldness head on. In my case, hair off.

Be blessed not stressed signing off

Rina or whatever

Princeton Farmers Market

Today I explored the Farmers Market with my sister, nieces and nephew and it was a cool experience. They have several local vendors set up from free t shirt bags, peach pies, fresh vegetables and Tico juice. I ordered a depression juice and no, I am not depressed. It consists of orange, carrot, beets, watermelon , cayenne and mint. The cayenne flavor was very intense and created a burning sensation in my stomach. I hope it burned some fat. I wouldn’t mind one bit.

Although, I only purchased a drink from Ticos juice truck, I will definitely be back to continue this experience. Our local high school North steel pan band and choir performed while people were shopping. Check out Ticos at ticosprinceton.com and view all the flavors they have to offer.

There’s free parking but please bring cash. They now offer you the ability to buy bucks at the entrance which can then be used to pay for goods. Also, they do accept SNAP benefits, just ask a member at the entrance. The market is open rain or shine from 10-3pm.

Check out cool pics of today

Hinds Plaza

55 Witherspoon St.

Princeton, NJ 08542

Meal Prep is not for a 9-5 MoM

How many have found themselves intrigued by watching YouTube videos of meal prepping and snack prepping for their family on a weekly basis? I know I have! I probably watched every single video pertaining to it. Guess what I did? I went out shopping for grocery and supplies to actually give it a twirl. I was super excited as if I was about to save the world and conquer this motherhood finally. I had all my color markers on deck to label the bags and cartons to hold the bags to be more organized. So much joy and anxiety to see the end results. I started preparing the snacks first and said I would cook later.

Downhill madness! First off, make sure you have eaten a sensible meal before doing this, but not too much where you get the itis! This was a bit extreme and I wanted someone to come and tag me out. I needed a break. I couldn’t even finish preparing the snacks. Remind you I have 4 kids plus myself! I’m exhausted typing the number 4.

Everything else came to mind as if I was going through some kind of withdrawal. I was having regrets questioning myself “am I this crazy to think I can meal/snack prep along with all the other task that needed to be completed before Monday?”, “I just had to have 4 kids!, not 2 but 4”. I then had to do a process of elimination as to what will not get done this weekend so my kids and I can go to our bed at a decent time.

Needless to say, it was a very smooth Monday morning because everything was packaged. It allowed me to have more time to do things and move at a comfortable pace. It does help monitor what the kids eat and how much they eat. Usually, they help their self and don’t think about the next day, which is expensive for a single mother like myself.

Will I be doing this again? Absolutely to the…… NO! I’ll prob do it for every 2-3 days but that’s about it. My time is valuable and I rather spend it with my kids and other worthy things. If there is a single working mother of 4 or more kids, that are meal and snack prepping, I would like to say “God bless your heart! You go girl”. When you are finish at your house come see me.

Signing off MoM Keeper

I am my sisters keeper

Anxiety Thursday

Am I the only one who stays up on a Thursday night eager for Friday to get here? I find so much energy on a Thursday night and I utilize it to do a lot of things I’ve missed during the week. I use it to clean my home or complete any overdue tasks.

They said you shouldn’t live your life watching the clock or the calendar but I can’t help it. Ready and eager to start my weekend of not having to be on time on someone’s else clock.

When this occurs, it is time to start strategizing on how you can have your own clock and say goodbye to anxiety Friday’s. Stay with me as I try to cook something up.

One love, one unity

Multiple Baby Fathers Syndrome

“I am not having kids!”, I use to say with such disgust. Be careful what you say!

I used to feel so ashamed of the life choices I have made as far as having kids. I was young and always dismissed my mother’s wisdom. Four kids, 3 baby fathers later, I have gained the wisdom to know better. I wish it was earlier, but I cannot rewind the clock.

I felt embarrassed making appointments and going to them with all four kids. I felt sadden that I was a single mother of four. This was a red flag as well for teachers and staff to feel pity for me and treated me as a charity case. That could be a good thing, right? We all need help, I sure do!

In AAA meetings, they said the first step is acknowledging your problem. Over the years I have constantly repeated their last names for different inquiry and it has helped me tremendously. I have gotten use to saying it repeatedly and now have embraced it for what it is. I am a single mother of four with three different baby fathers.

It is not the end of my life. It is apart of my life and I still deserve greatness. Live your best life without regrets. Speak it, claim it and live with it. No shame over here!

There are others just like you so don’t think you are different!

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INTRO TO KARINA 101

purple flowers

Photo by Lisa Fotios on Pexels.com

I am a single mother of 4 beautiful children and according to statistics I am 1 out of 5 women with multiple baby fathers. I graduated NAU with my Bachelor of Science in Management despite my odds. I was raised by a strong Jamaican woman and it’s because of her I strive to be my best for my kids despite my life choice. I enjoy traveling with my children and supporting their dreams. I love James Patterson novels and I enjoy arts & crafts from time to time.

I believe in sharing one’s experience because it reveals the fact that you are not alone in any situation or circumstances. It helps alleviate any concerns and bring awareness to empower you to keep pushing forward with grace and dignity.

So..yeah, I have 4 children (16,12,5 & 2 yr old) and 3 baby fathers, yet I am still standing. It was difficult at first to acknowledge it, but now I am standing firm with my head held high. Maybe I should host an MBD (multiple baby daddy) meeting…..

On another note, I have two sisters from my mother side. We are still growing and learning how to be sisters. It takes a village to raise a kid and we are all each others support. We all need support in our lives and thats why I have created Karina’s Keeper. I am my sisters keeper and I will do my best to support all of my sisters.

Join me on this new Journey of embracing parenting all by myself and still trying to explore the world on a budget!